How can you be a good woman
How to become a good woman: and be the best thing a man can have
A good woman is someone who cares enough about how to become a good wife. Take courage, nobody is perfect, all you have to do is love him perfectly.
When I decided to write about how to be a good woman, all I could do was roll my own eyes. If you asked my husband if I was a good wife, I'm sure he would say "maybe", but only out of fear. We all want to be the perfect wife, don't we?
We want to be the woman we all grew up with, who watches on TV, who is kind, who laughs when her husband tries something, or is okay when he goes out with friends seven nights a week. The problem is that a good wife is an illusion that destroys the way we see ourselves, as well as the way men think of their wives.
How to be a Good Wife - The 7 Things That Make All the Difference
Nobody is perfect. I mean, maybe it was Mother Teresa, maybe it wasn't her to tell. All I know is that when the kids are crying, I've been locked in my house all day and my husband comes home pretending that I don't exist, it's really, really hard to be a good wife.
So what does a good woman look like? Well I say all the time that when I come back in my next life I want a wife. When I envision the perfect woman for my next life, she has these 7 qualities.
If you ask how you can be a good wife, there is a good chance you will think that you are not good enough. Take heart; The fact that you even worry makes you damn amazing. If I had a dollar for every time I saw a woman scold her husband, make a weekend list, or say goodbye every weekend to do a different "girls weekend", I would be a very wealthy woman.
Did I mention that if I had a lot of money, maybe I would be more of the perfect woman because I could sit around and have someone look after the kids, do the laundry, clean the house, and have me look beautiful too? The biggest tip on how to be a good wife is just to try to breathe and take life as it comes. Here are 7 tips on how to be a good wife.
# 1 Take a deep breath. It's hard not to break out with the kids running around, the house is messy, you're late for a meeting, and your husband can't care what you're up to. The thing is, someone would freak out in your shoes.
If you want to know how to be a good wife, take a break and take a breath before you react. It's typical when we're in the heat of the fight we're cracking, and the most likely candidate to get the brunt of it is the guy we said "me" to.
# 2 Don't think marriage is a fairy tale . Most likely, if you're asking how to be a good wife, you've subscribed to the idea that there is such a thing. I've lived a long time and what I know is that the idea of perfect is ... not perfect.
The couple you think is perfect, the husband you think is perfect, and, yes, even the woman you think is perfect is not. She may be more patient than you, but that's just her personality style. Trust me, whatever you think she has about you, she doesn't. She's probably better off hiding the madman or moving him elsewhere.
# 3 Stop being perfect . When I was younger I thought that a good woman was the woman who came down in a nightie and no matter how many years had passed, she still had a baby face and a perfect body. This made me constantly nourish or overwork my body.
Translation ... I made myself miserable, which led me to misbehave, which led to my madness. My point is, the more you try to achieve the image you have in your head of perfection, the less likely you are to be the perfect person for your partner. No matter how thin I was or how beautiful I tried to be, in the end my husband just wanted to be a happy woman who stared at him.
# 4 Be happy . Happy woman happy life. If you are constantly concerned about being the perfect woman, then don't just enjoy the ride. If you want to know how to be a good wife then stop trying to live by the book, be Martha Stewart, or give your husband some singles for the strip club on the way out.
All of the ways we try to figure out how to be a good woman ends up making us feel less bad than inappropriate and leading us to be a less than happier version of ourselves. A man wants to feel fulfilled when someone is waiting for him at home who is happy. A good wife loves her husband and her life, neither nor.
# 5 Do the little things. It's not about being everything or doing everything. Being a good wife means spending the time and energy doing the little things on a big scale.
If something is missing in your husband, try to fill it. If he has to pick me up, be there to pick him up. If he's not feeling well, be there to pamper him.
If he's not happy, be the girl who takes him for a drink to distract him from his problems. It is in the fine and small details where you find the person who really loves you. The best way to find out how to be a good wife is to know how to do the little things that make a big difference and turn even the worst of your day around.
# 6 Stop it. As women we are fearful creatures. By nature fixers, we not only have to solve everything, we also have to solve it now. Instead of getting on and over it right away, go to bed, be crazy, braise a little, and allow him not to talk for two days. And be safe enough to go away and know that there is time in the future to address whatever is going on.
Boys are different from girls; You need time to process. The way to find out how to be a good woman is to give him some space, create some distance, and stop pushing and pushing a problem that leads on the road to misery.
# 7 Just love him . Seems like a no-brainer, doesn't it? It is not. What you say to your husband and what he hears are two very different things. If you give "constructive criticism" there is nothing constructive about it. If you want to know how to be a good woman, stop making him perfect. Guys are difficult creatures.
You can't change them, and the more you try, the more they hear rejection. Instead of thinking "if he just did what I want everything would be perfect," allow him to be perfect in his imperfections.
You married him for a reason, trust your decision, and even if he's not perfect, stop trying so hard. The truth is, you're not perfect either, and there are probably a lot of things he would change about you if he could.
Realizing that nothing is perfect is the first step to perfection. You will never be the perfect woman, he will never be the perfect husband, and I'll just say for the record you will never be the perfect couple.
The good news is that there is nothing brilliant or exciting about being "perfect". Indeed, perfection is according to the book, it follows the rules, it is predictable, and it doesn't go around or go beyond the limits.
So if you follow these tips on how to become a good wife, you will be fine. Your husband just wants a happy wife, a happy life, and someone who believes that even in his imperfections he is absolutely perfect.
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